16 Weeks

Hi all!  I took a 14 week picture and planned to post an update but then I had yet another bleeding episode and an ultrasound and was bedridden for a couple of days.  Then it was Christmas and I was out of town for five days.  Then I was back...for one day.  And off again on a five day two-city concert tour for New Year's.  I think I only slept in my own bed for half of the month of December.  DH was there even less.  We have SO much going on but luckily the pregnancy has been fine and dandy ever since my 14 week scare.

I'm wearing the same dress I wore in my ten week and four week posts.  My bump is getting crazy.  I used to think it was cute but my belly button is now a huge cavernous hole so t-shirts and bathing suits I've been trying on for my upcoming trip look silly.

First, the vitals....

How Far Along: 16 weeks, 3 days
Size of baby: Baby is the size of an avocado, I love avocados
Total Weight Gain/Loss: I swear to Santa that I didn't gain any weight at all until this week.  Four pounds in just a matter of days.  I'm pretty bummed about it actually.  I'm still down six pounds from the day of retrieval and one pound from my pre-IVF weight.  I hope I can start exercising soon.
Workouts: I walked to the bank and back.
Maternity Clothes: A mix of maternity clothes and regular clothes.

Gender: We will find out February 1st! 3rd because we're doing a cheesy gender reveal cake with our families.  Hate away, I'm excited!

Movement: Maybe?

Sleep: Eh

What I miss: Wine

Cravings: Really wanted roast beef today but got to the cafeteria too late.

Symptoms: Killer headache and still so tired.  Standing up ---> cramps
Anxiety Level: Highest when I'm trying to sleep, was about a 6 when DH was driving home from Jersey late at night and I was in bed waiting for him.

Best Moment this week: Seeing my favorite band ring in the new year in Portland, Maine.

Reading: I finished We Need to Talk About Kevin (started a long time ago but I wouldn't recommend it to pregnant people!) and now I'm on 11/22/63 by Stephen King.

Dad is: Dealing with the news of a sick grandmother, stressed with work, applying to new jobs because his boss is a jerk, excited for our cruise.

 

 

Still on pelvic rest despite the fact that the NP I saw at my 14 week appointment said I only needed to be on it for two weeks after a bleed and it's been over two weeks.  I'm sticking to the more serious rule of no funny business until the anatomy scan.  We cheated once though because nine weeks without intimacy is...well nine weeks without intimacy.  All was well but I felt guilty.  I have an appointment tomorrow so hopefully I can get a definitive answer on what I should be doing.

 

We had a great time at our concerts over New Year but I had to remain seated most of the time because standing up for long period of time makes me crampy and uncomfortable.  Also, my belly hurts.  I haven't seen this on any other sites.  It's like I can feel it growing all the time and it is just totally weird. I thought I felt kicks the other night but it may have just been the music vibrations on my stomach.

 

I took to bed with a wicked headache last night.  So far today I've been headache free.

 

We leave for Florida on Saturday where we'll hang out for two days before getting on our first ever cruise.  I'm pretty excited.  A little overwhelmed with work, packing and oh yeah, DH's grandmother was just diagnosed with leukemia and our car was hit today.  I could use a day at the beach.

On an emotional note...I was a mess today thinking of about something being wrong with Gizmo.  I still haven't really come to terms with the fact that he will be an actual baby in my arms in June.  I'm just not ready to think that way.  But the idea of him not being safe and sound in my belly anymore makes me uncontrollably sad.  Normal I guess but I'm going to bring it up with my therapist tomorrow.

Also...my psychiatrist wants me to wean off of Zoloft!  That conversation sent me into a stress spiral for two days.  I don't think I am going to do it but I'll reexamine after the cruise.  Her reasoning is that I'm on such a low dose (50 mg) and have so many resources available to me for my anxiety that she's not even sure I'm symptomatic anymore.  I'll share more thoughts on this at a later date because they are lengthy.