Benjamin - One Month Old

Amazingly, Benjamin turned one month old yesterday.  Ever since DH told me that he looked up where Benjamin fit in the infant growth chart I had been anxiously awaiting his one month appointment.  I know he came a little early and is eating a lot and having the appropriate number of diapers but, oh man, how I feared that scale.  Call it new parent anxiety but I felt so guilty thinking that ninety six percent of babies were bigger than my Benjamin.  Every time he ate I would think, grow, baby, grow!

So now the results are in!

(Someone was a little too tired for this photo.)

Weight and other stats: Eight pounds, eight ounces!!!  Up from six pounds, four ounces at birth and six pounds, eleven ounces at around two weeks.  He is now in the thirteenth percentile.  DH and I were so excited.  He is twenty one and one quarter inches tall, up from seventeen at birth.  This lands him in the thirty third percentile.  His head circumference is thirty seven point six centimeters (fifty eighth percentile). 

Size: Up until a week ago the clothes that fit him best were a pack of Preemie onesies.  Now he's solidly in Newborn sizes.  Newborn Pampers Swaddlers are our diaper of choice but we may switch to Size One soon. 

Eating: Benjamin is now being bottle fed exclusively.  I'm not ready to write about how we got here but I know it's the right decision for our family.  I am pumping to ensure he gets breast milk and he is currently eating around twenty five ounces a day, eighteen of which are breast milk.  This works out to be an average of ten bottles, but only about seven feedings.  This is because every now and then we'll prep a three ounce bottle and Benjamin will want more so we give him a second smaller bottle.  Usually we can expect him to eat 3.5 ounces in one sitting but he's been known to suck down six ounces every now and again.

Sleeping: I've seen so many other moms refer to their baby's "naps" which confuses me because, if Benjamin is not eating, he is sleeping, save for two wakeful periods a day.  So I guess he has four "naps" a day and then wakes up twice at night?  But when does the day start?  Anyway the kid sleeps.  He sleeps on a Jeep.  He sleeps with a sheep.  At around two weeks we started using the swing intermittently for "naps" and he loves it.  He also sleeps in his bassinet, Rock and Play, car seat or wherever we happen to put him down.  I would say he sleeps for about sixteen hours a day. 

Likes: Eating and sleeping?  Cuddling.  His monkey Wubbanub (but only in the car seat). 

Dislikes: Being changed.  Waiting for a bottle.  Being cold. 

We have a pretty great baby.  Since my last entry we've had two more road trips.  One for my sister in law's memorial about two and a half hours away.  We only had to stop for a quick diaper change.  The second was to visit my parents (also two and a half hours away) who watched him while DH and I went out on the town.  He slept the whole way there and back!

It's been an amazing month!

Our Due Date Is Here

I never thought I'd have a twenty day old baby on June 17th, yet, as much as I said over and over again how I was prepared to be pregnant past my due date, I much prefer having Benjamin safely here at home with us instead.  We went out to lunch yesterday for DH's birthday and Father's Day and I ran into a friend who is due on Friday.  Just looking at her made me cringe a bit.  Wow, she is really pregnant!  I'm so thankful that I'm not!

Now that I've put that out in the universe, I bet my second kid will be two weeks late.  Oh well.  That's not happening for a while, but I can totally understand the newborn envy mothers of older children experience.  I always said that babies were just a gateway to my preferred stage of development, namely kindergartners.  And sure, I'm still looking forward to that age.  But newborns are SO perfect.  They are so small and dependent and every time they open their eyes it's a gift.  Benjamin gets older every day and it's so cool (but hard!) to watch.  You really wish you could freeze time.

We've had a great twenty days.  Everyone always remarks how we've taken Benjamin "everywhere!" but really we've just been to a few local places, including a street fair last Saturday and the annual Gay Pride Festival in the park across from our condo last Sunday.  Apparently this makes me a rebel in the eyes of my family.  We've also been to Walmart, the doctor's office and three restaurants within walking distance of home.  All were a wild success!  Benjamin sleeps in the car seat anytime we take him out somewhere.  He even manages to stay roughly on his eating schedule.  We are pretty lucky.

This past Saturday was our first family road trip.  I was nervous about taking him in the car lest he woke up and we had to pull over to comfort him but, amazingly, he slept the entire 90 minute ride both ways!  We went to my aunt's house and Benjamin got to meet my entire extended family.

Tomorrow we may take a walk down to a park outside my office and have lunch with a coworker who wants to meet Benjamin.  And Thursday I was thinking of taking him to a Mommy and Baby group at the place where we took birth classes. Hopefully the weather will cooperate.

In career news, I had my two job interviews last week and I think they went well.  I'm being considered for three different positions.  I'd greatly prefer one of them over the others but if I'm offered any I will likely accept.  Fingers crossed.

Thursday we were at the doctor's office because Benjamin had the sniffles and found out he weighed 6 pounds, 11 ounces.  That's a gain of seven ounces in a week!  He's still only in the 5th to 10th percentile but I'm happy he's gaining steadily.  I've been getting more and more milk from my breast pump so he is now getting mostly breast milk in his bottles.  Yesterday, for example, I expressed fourteen ounces and he consumed twenty four ounces - his second most hungry day yet!

Physically, I'm feeling good.  Bleeding had tapered off but then came back yesterday.  I'm experiencing some nighttime anxiety still, which sucks, but Benjamin has been sleeping good stretches at night.  Last night I slept from 12-3 and then took over from DH.  Benjamin woke up again around 3:40 and 6:20.  In between I sleep on the couch or play on my computer depending on how tired I am.  Then, when H gets up for work at 8 or 9 I go back into the bedroom and watch the Today Show or sleep. Or pump.  Pumping is easier now that my Medela Freestyle has arrived.  It's just as efficient as the hospital pump I rented but much smaller so you can (theoretically) walk around while you're pumping.  My only complaint so far is how loud it is!

Not 39 Weeks - Postpartum Check In

Today at 9 o'clock I got a text from Baby Center that said "you are 39 weeks pregnant."  Sigh.  Its still unbelievable to me that, not only is Benjamin here, he has been with us for the past fourteen days.  I never got to worry about not going into labor before my (evil) doctor pushed an induction.  I never got to take last pictures of a ridiculously pregnant belly.  I never got to go into work days from my due date and make everyone worry I was going to have the baby under my desk.  I never got my farewell maternity leave cake!

Obviously I wouldn't change a thing and I'm glad Benjamin is here and healthy.  Just, wow, how did this happen?

There's so much I want to write about.  My birth story (nearly done).  Our postpartum hospital stay.  All things Benjamin, etc.  But for now, since it's easier and on my mind, I want to write about my postpartum recovery.

Weight: This has been a pretty awesome side effect of giving birth. Despite not really gaining weight during my pregnancy, I lost over twenty five pounds within days of having Benjamin.  I'm now about twenty two pounds below my pre-pregnancy weight.  And people I've seen or who have seen pictures of me on Facebook have not been shy about pointing it out. I'm really hoping I can maintain this weight until at least my six weeks postpartum appointment and then start working on dieting and working out to lose a little more.  Once upon a time (i.e. seven years ago) I was a healthy weight and I'd love to get back in that range.

Mental Health: Good.  Also better than expected.  I am still trying to reconcile the tragedy of my sister in law's death with the joy of the birth of my son and frankly I'm not sure I'll ever be "over it" exactly but I just try to enjoy each day and be thankful. I had Benjamin's placenta made into capsules and I really think taking them has helped my moods stabilize.  I'm basing this on the very thin anecdotal evidence of the one day I forgot to take my capsule my moods were a little more out of control.  I always said even if placenta encapsulation has absolutely no medical value, for $150, it was a risk I was willing to take and I'm glad we did it.

Just like the anxiety I experienced during pregnancy, I feel most anxious at night, particularly when my husband and I start sleeping in shifts.  I am grateful that I have been getting a decent amount of sleep but it's just not the same when you are used to going to sleep whenever you want and sleeping as long as you want.

I was able to attend my regular Friday therapy session at only ten days postpartum.  It was important to me to keep the appointment because I'll be leaving Benjamin with my husband to go on my job interviews this week.  More on that below.

Physical Health: I'm taking iron pills right now because I'm slightly anemic, and they are awful.  But I stopped taking pain killers day ago.  I don't have any vaginal pain.  I'm still bleeding and it gets heavier depending on my level of activity.  I assume my stitches have healed since I haven't felt them.  I get tired from standing long periods of time but that may be due to the whole reduced sleep factor.

Co-parenting: Going well.  We are mostly bottle feeding so it has allowed us to give each other breaks, which is nice.  DH sleeps a solid block of five hours at night in a row, while I take usually two shifts of three hours.  During the day it's much easier since we are both rested.  H did a little work starting the second day back from the hospital so that he wouldn't be too far behind and didn't have to charge his vacation time.  Starting today he is "back" on a part time basis for the week, but it's nice that he's still physically here since he works from home.

Maternity Leave Thoughts: I was enjoying watching The Today Show for a while but it's ironically very repetitive.  It's weird not being at work on a Monday.  It's weirder still thinking I may never return to my current job.  I have a certain level of guilt about that for some reason (then again I feel guilty a lot lately!).  In addition to the long awaited job interview that Benjamin's birth threw a kink in, I just got a call today from another agency and I'll be interviewing with them on Friday.  I don't want to count my chickens but if I were a better man, I would wager that some agency will snap me up by the time my maternity leave is up.  If I get a new job before DH (who has been interviewing for months) I will just laugh.  Wish me luck.

Benjamin is Here!

In my last entry, I wrote that I wanted to stay pregnant for at least two more weeks.  As a result I went and had a baby the very next day.  I didn't get to go on my job interview or ditch my OB's office.  I DID, however, get to deliver the world's best baby into the world on Tuesday, May 28th at 2:11 p.m. after a fast and furious labor.  Benjamin Eli couldn't wait to meet us.

We love him so much.

More (and more!) to come.

And my job interview has been rescheduled. :-)